After my wife Hanna surprised me with a replica musky for our anniversary at the end of August, we tacitly agreed to a moratorium on taxidermy for a while. The expense and lack of wall space were the primary considerations.
A few days later I left for Brazil.
Since we already have two gorgeous peacocks on the wall, I knew that I was unlikely to create art from anything short of a world record of that fish. The world-class wolf fish that populate the area I visited are hideously ugly. Some people might want them on the wall of their home or office, and indeed we saw several replicas at the lodge and in a tackle shop in Manaus, but I feared that putting one in our home might give me nightmares and the dog a heart attack.
We were safe from purchasing more overpriced fiberglass.
Or so I thought.
When I realized that the river we fished had monster payara – the silvery sabertoothed freaks of the jungle – I set my sights on catching one over 20 pounds, which I knew in the back of my mind would justify a wall-hanging. The first day out for them I caught a small one, but the first time I devoted an entire afternoon to the “executive hole” I landed six, starting with a remarkable 29-pounder and several more above 20.
It was all over but the credit card bill.
Indeed, I got home at 2pm on Sunday and sent an email to the taxidermist that evening. When he hadn’t responded by noon on Monday, I started researching other options (most of them sucked) and panicking, so I picked up the phone. He’d been busy with other projects and was waiting to call until he’d checked his warehouse to make sure he had a mold big enough. He checked shortly thereafter and found a perfect 41” mold. Problem solved.
Now it’s all about waiting.
And wall space.
I’d say that I’m done, but I’ve gone down that road before and didn’t last much more than a week before going back on my word. We might need a bigger house before this is all said and done. Of course, we won’t be able to afford it due to the increasing bills from the replica shop, but that’s a privileged problem to suffer through.
